Fat as Hell…

and not going to take it anymore!

Trigger (un)Happy

Lately, I’ve been trying to pay attention to the patterns in my eating, or more specifically, my overeating. It seems like my ability to stay on track, to eat sensibly and to stick to my exercise routine is easily undermined by certain conditions. For lack of a better way to put it, I guess I’ve been looking for the things that “trigger” my tendency to overeat, in the hopes that recognizing these triggers will help me avoid them. I find that being aware of my behavior can sometimes help me curb the negative aspects of it.

Anyway, although I’m sure there are others, this is the list I’ve come up with so far.

Trigger

Description

Me?

Boredom This is pretty self explanatory. You’re bored, so you eat. I see this as being true for me occasionally, but I’m usually able to recognize and prevent this kind of overeating.
Self Loathing You hate the fat on your body, so you look for comfort, ironically, in more food. I definitely see this as being a problem for me. When I’m feeling bad about myself, it’s especially easy to drown myself in food. Without a doubt, I am a glass half full kind of girl which, sadly, often leads to a too full plate kind of meal.
Stress Again, self explanatory. When the going gets tough, the fat go eating. This can be true for me. But I don’t stress *alone* as being a terribly dangerous trigger for me personally. Rather, I think stress in combination with other triggers is truly a recipe for disaster.
Lack of Willpower You just don’t have the mental fortitude to stick to your eating plan. When it comes right down to it, I’m essentially lazy, so yeah… will power, or lack thereof, can definitely be a problem for me.
Fatigue Zzzzzz. Absolutely. Losing weight takes energy, effort and a lot of work. When I’m pooped, it feels nearly impossible to do.
Habit Your lifestyle is arranged such that overeating is a part of your routine. Recently, I’ve realized that this is more of an issue for me than I would have thought. I need a *routine* filled with healthy habits in order to survive. When my routine is disruptive, I revert to the unhealthy habits of old.
Emotional Association You find yourself in situations that feel like a time when you turned to food, so you turn to food again. Yeah. This happens more often than I would like to admit.

It’s funny, but when I look at this list, all laid out before me, it does feel a little overwhelming — as though there’s an awful lot of forces out there, conspiring against me. I mean, with traps like these lying in wait around every corner, it’s no wonder that I fuck up from time to time. However, as with all things, I’m learning that identifying, accepting and facing the problem are essential first steps in conquering them. I’ll never learn to *not* overeat in the face of these triggers, if I refuse to acknowledge their existence and the power that they have over me.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this whole blogging thing it’s that while all of us share a few things in common… we all struggle, we all hate what being fat has done to us and we all want to do better… for every way that we’re similar, there’s at least one other way in which our stories are varied. We’re all different people, with different personality ticks, different backgrounds, different relationships with foods and, I’d be willing to guess, different things that trigger our unhealthy behaviors. Just as each of us have to learn to recognize our own individual recipes for disaster, so too do we have to identify our own unique plan for success.

That said, this blogging thing really does help, doesn’t it?

Each time I stay away for awhile, I’m reminded of all the reasons why I need this. I need the support, the tokens of kindness and the wisdom that each of you so generously shares with me. But most of all, I need the camaraderie. It’s so helpful to know that I’m not alone.

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August 10, 2008 - Posted by | losing weight | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

7 Comments »

  1. No sista, you are most definately not alone. Keep on truckin’! :D

    Comment by Olivia | August 10, 2008 | Reply

  2. I have to agree. Blogging has been an important part of my weight loss plan. Both the self reflection and the feedback are vital to success.

    Comment by Kate | August 10, 2008 | Reply

  3. I think it helps to identify them like you have. Knowledge is power after all.

    Comment by AndrewE | August 10, 2008 | Reply

  4. Out of all of the changes to my lifestyle, blogging has by far had the most profound impact.

    You are definitely not alone and I can identify with nearly all of the behaviours outlined in that table!

    Comment by Marshmallow | August 10, 2008 | Reply

  5. Blogging puts you in a position to think. Change comes from thinking, so they’re a nice pair. :) LOL

    Do more of what works, less of what doesn’t. Wish it were as easy as saying it, but life’s kind of like that.

    You’ve come a long ways. You can keep it up.

    Comment by Joe Average | August 11, 2008 | Reply

  6. I’m printing this entry and sticking the chart in all my cupboards as a reminder

    Comment by aishchai | August 11, 2008 | Reply

  7. blogging is a great way to reduce stress in your life. gets you outside your head by doing something. It’s kinda like meditation in a way.

    Comment by Gordon | July 24, 2011 | Reply


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